Tank Healing – My Mini-Rant

“Sweat saves blood.”
Erwin Rommel

Tank Healing – My Mini-Rant

Let me just get this off my chest.
Then I’ll move on.

What is up with the tanks?
I heal two sets of tanks during the week. One raid team, neither tank will speak! I’ve only heard one of their voices with a “stay on the boss” near the end of a kill.
The OTHER raid team, I can’t describe. One mumbles but super fast, I type to my Guild Master to translate and good luck with that. The other has so much tobacco dip between his cheek and gum, everything is garbled. He mumbles fast too.

Zomg, the AP speed runs in Heroic Raids — if you can find the tank, maybe you can heal him. Prolly don’t need it, let him die and learn a lesson. Horrible attitude, it goes against everything that is MMO.

Healing can drive me nuts because, while many tanks are divas, they are also insecure people. You don’t dare ask them a question for fear of offending!

And my question is this:
“Are you running your protective spells on rotation and situation or not?”
Are you blowing it off to try to get your DPS high and placing the full burden on the healers? It sure can feel that way, right? But, you can’t ask and there are too many classes of tank to learn their job too.

I don’t dare ask that question, no.

I’m all about communication. The job in my real life was to coordinate hundreds of people to be ready to “go” all at the same time, on time, every time. I even learned to get everyone lined up and then hold for exactly five minutes … then go! Getting people ready to perform is my talent.

People who refuse to communicate can drive me nuts. That hoser who got fel bonds but won’t say “diamond in the back” on his mic, he would rather die. The arrogance of a tank to not mark himself, I mean, why not? It is a tool in the box to use to make things go, go, go. Again, my spell range is 40 yards, I’m not zoomed in to watch you tap dance around a boss!

And then I feel like a diva, calling out stuff because it needs to be done. “Dispell, dispell, dispell.” Otherwise, I’m watching the timed moment go by and the swirl into the toilet has begun. I’ll even be diplomatic, “Do we pop hero now? On phase three”? If I didn’t speak up, would someone (anyone, please) step up?

What is up with those tanks? What is it about the tanking role that lures personalities like that? They are solid players and wear the Proven title but they feel like that they have to stand alone, a tower of strength and so would not warn the team that predictable incoming damage is going to happen. They’d never ask for help when the stacks are too high they would rather die.

Tsk, don’t tell me the job is too hard. No one is so busy that they can’t speak. I’ve seen the cooldowns for tanks, they have tons of time. They are drumming their fingers waiting for an 8 second taunt.

And don’t get me started on random Heroic Dungeons. I’ll put a star on their heads and they’ll take it off, “Don’t follow me! I’m the tank! If you don’t know the path, then you don’t belong here. I’ll be way up ahead, ignoring the adds that I left behind. If you look closely, you’ll see that I’m in DPS spec.” Are they trying? Are they running their protective spells or throwing the burden onto me?

Y’see, if I knew. If I knew, I could change talents or legendary pieces. I could happily make it all about you, I’ve dealt with divas my entire life. But you won’t tell me, I have to discover you.

I’m exhausted!

Rant over. I’m done.
Time to move on, eh?


3 thoughts on “Tank Healing – My Mini-Rant

  1. Despite the rant, it was actually a great rant! Because I can easily relate.

    Where I no longer have the time to raid, I´m quite sure I could have written this piece. Sometimes I have wonder the same thing. It is sad to see how communication as a whole in WoW has gone downhill for years already. I often think, do tanks believe they are immortal? That could be the reason for not speaking, at all, not even in dire situations. “I got this, I never die, I´m supposed to get healed” attitude. Then again, some DPS do that too. Healers as well.

    I think Legion “I can heal too”- kind of tanking (also before, i guess?) has made it quite easy to be a tank, in some ways.

    Oh, how I loathe getting Maw of Souls as my Random HC Dungeon (which i don´t always do, but I try). When tanks pull the entire ship, without using interrupts or anything of the sort, without checking the rest of the group, not realizing the dps are all freshly dinged 110s…

    I call them Roadrunner tanks, and I follow them around going “meep meep”…

    Liked by 2 people

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